its scary how things all end so fast. it seems like just yesterday that i chanced upon the tpjcanoeing poster around school and decided to try out.

it has ended. my canoeing career. all the effort, time have all gone up in smoke. have it?

it just kills me to know that, even though we gave our best. best, we still didnt make it, we still ended up slower than what? srjcanoeing? OMG. that i cannot accept. what the fuck? we are that effing slow?

whatever. its the end. thank God.

im relieved that i dont have to put up with things that i have been putting up with. seriously.

THANK GOD.

I'm feeling pretty emotional today. However, i cannot seem to organise my thoughts well enough to express myself in words. Nevertheless, i shall give it a shot.

We celebrated Mr. Chua's thirty-seven birthday today. The entire senior team was present in full strength. lt is a rare ocassion that everyone would be there to bless us with their presence, because some people would always miraculously vanish right after training.

One. I really enjoyed the feeling of being in a team where we press on and push each other towards a common goal. It is something that i did not exactly experience in chinese dance, or students' council. There was too much politics for my liking. As i soaked into tonight's fun and laughter, questions popped out at the back of my mind. 

How many more gatherings like this are going to happen in the future? Are we even going to be in contact anymore after we graduate? Would we turn into strangers we would not even say Hi to on the streets. Would friendships that we have just go up into smoke?

What exactly does the future have installed for us?

Thats it, I'm not only a loser, I'm also a pessimist.

We are all moving too fast forward, stop and take a good look around you. You would realise that things are not the way you've remembered, or thought they were to be.

I was staring out of the window on bus 36 today, on my way to meet my parents for dinner. Strangely, nothing seemed familiar to me. I can might as well be in Hong Kong. Though it was nothing to the extreme of being alien, but it just did not seem like home. It is not just the new physical surroundings. How long has it been since you have taken a good look at your parents. A good long while isn't it? Daddy looked like he has put on 20 years worth of wrinkles and half a head full of white hair. He also no longer has that huge appetite for food that I inherited. Mummy has also put on her fair share of wrinkles, minus the white hair. She has the weary look worn on her face. My parents are growing old, aging. Are yours? (The expensive products, facials that my parents go for are so not working.)
What have you done, I done to cause the crease on their foreheads, what have I done to lessen their worries?


Here are the Steps taken by the Choo Family in times of Inflation.

Mr Choo- 1. Dine in places without GST, service tax.
2. Apply for memberships at stores.
3. Indulge in expensive watches.

Mrs Choo- 1.Buy in-house brands at supermarkets.
2. Ensure that daughter does not tag along during grocery shopping.
3. Keep coupons.
4. Buy expensive treads for knitting.

Miss Choo- 1. Keep ATM card at safely at home.
2. Take lesser taxis. Or at least try to.
3. Shop more during GSS.


MANY MANY THANKS TO ALL THOES WHOM HAVE REMEMBERED MY BIRTHDAY!

1. My pretty aunties and my cousins. Thank you for that expensive lunch and all the angpows. Thank you, Chel for the gift and the trip to you know where and we got lost. Thank you!

2. The TPJCanoeing team. Thank you for all the food that you have made me carry around and the 18 donuts. Thank you, Eunice for the card. Thank you Kahmun for the handcrafted book/card. Thank you WenJie for the stones and cookies.

3. My beloved classmates. Thank you Sab, Sheik, Kamilah for the presents! I loved it. Thank you XinYing for the Chocolates. They were lovely.

4. Cassandra and Qian. Thank you for the presents. It would be funny if we all had the same one!

5. BullionParkers. Thank you for all the well wishes! Even though, May Tan was late. Haha. Daryl was not this year!

In NUTSHELL, thank you thank you thank you. I really appreciated everything! And there is no word/phrase/sentence to express my gratitude.

Father's Day was fun. Okay, I have to admit, wind surfing is actually kinda enjoyable. And, watching my parents fall into the water all the time, ha, PRICELESS! Can you just imagine, my fat father struggling to get back up to the board? The scene is just hilarious. And my mother, stilling on top of the board, too afraid to move. Its so entertaining. If only I had not felt like puking all the while, I would have more fun.

Oh wells, back to case study 7!

Lunch at Carlton, was simply heavenly. The dim sum, oh my. You will never want to leave at all.

Followed by Beef Bonitos at Franky's. Scrumptious.

Bushmen Shrooms at Outback. Sinful. [Thank God, I fled before it was served.]

Dinner at Ding Tai Fung. Totally felt like puking already.

June's cake. OMG. I felt like my stomach was about to burst. The cake was like stucked, at my throat.


I saw the other side of Daryl today. The gentle, considerate, charming side. He finally brought his girlfriend along! I swear, I have never ever seen Daryl behave the way he did today, in our like almost 15 years of friendship.

I bought the dress that I was eyeing for at Miss Selfridge! HAH. I feel satisfied. My next material indulgence would be the Liz bag.

I have no idea how much I spent. But, I sure have enjoyed myself. Now, who says money can't buy happiness?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JUNE DARL.
You know how much I love you. Thank you for being there 24/7. Nothing can replace you my, darling!



RANDOM RUMBLES.

As the day draws closer, tension piles up around us higher than before. It is just a matter of time before anyone snaps. Needless to say, it is not a pretty scene that anyone would want to see. Neither do I. And, neither would I want to see, myself as the lead character of all that drama.


Marcus thinks that I am the one with the shortest fuse around. I beg to differ. I think its you, Marc. You always know how to piss me off or break me down.


I do keep a huge part of my life to myself. That is because, I would not know how to face anyone, whom knows me entirely. But, I can let you in on a little secret. I enjoy running away from my problems. There, thats it. That is me. LOSER RIGHT.

The bryan boy, nearly irritated the shit out of me. I was this close to smacking his ass. This close.


As, I did SL today, i wondered to myself. Hey, itsn't it good to be 8 again? Although, most of you might not agree, this is how I feel. I envied those children for being who they are. Behaving in manners that I would never dream of doing so. They have nothing to worry about. Tomorrow, would always be there. Mummy and Daddy would never stop loving me. It is the kinda thing that as you grow older you can't do. Because, you realised that nothing is going to be there forever. You cannot take things for granted anymore. And, you are afraid of losing grip of the things closest to you.

It is the uncertainty in life, something that you realise as you mature that causes the fear within me. Because, now I can never be certain of what is going to happen the next year, tomorrow or the next moment. I cannot tell you that, this is what that is going to happen tomorrow. There are bound to be surprises that are going to spring up from nowhere, catching me off guard and defenceless.

This is why, I want to be 8 again. I want to depend on someone that I have full trust in. To count on that person whenever I'm in trouble.

Something that I would never achieve, now that I'm almost 18.