it wasnt your fault the other night when i cried after we quarrelled. its just that i have been holding the tears back for far too long. and i guess. i just couldnt take it anymore. and im totally sorry for being such a jerk.

& guess what. im totally not cut out to work at ritz.

i realized i've been living in my own world for 17 years. i have not stopped or bothered to stop and care for anyone around me as much as i should have. never. i have been such a self-centered person.

i just realized today that many people around me has problems and difficulties that they face. and in which, if i were in their shoes, i would want someone to offer a helping hand or just listen and let me unload. so, since i have realized, i have decided to help as much as i can. or i would be very much of an asshole wouldn't i?


today's training was horrible. i feel that im getting slower and slower. i aint fit enough. that is a fact. but besides that. i think it was alright. mr chua blew his top at us at the end of the training. in my opinion, its the accumulation of all the little little stuff that totally weighed down today, and today was the limit of his patience? well. we should really be more disciplined.

actually, i have more to say. but yeah. i think that will be all since i cant restrict the viewers to this post.


have a fun week ahead! and think from someone else's viewpoint for a change.

how true is maslow's hierarchy of needs?

in my opinion, very.
guess what. the more we have, the more we want. it just doesnt stop.





Maslow's hierarchy of needs is often depicted as a pyramid consisting of five levels: the four lower levels are grouped together as deficiency needs associated with physiological needs, while the top level is termed growth needs associated with psychological needs. Deficiency needs must be met first. Once these are met, seeking to satisfy growth needs drives personal growth. The higher needs in this hierarchy only come into focus when the lower needs in the pyramid are satisfied. Once an individual has moved upwards to the next level, needs in the lower level will no longer be prioritized. However, if a lower set of needs is no longer being met, the individual will temporarily re-prioritize those needs by focusing attention on the unfulfilled needs. The individual never regresses from one level to a lower one, however. An example of this fact may be a businessman at the esteem level who is diagnosed with cancer. He will spend a great deal of time concentrating on his health (Physiological needs) but would still value his work performance (esteem needs) and is likely to return to work during periods of remission.

my father says im overly materialistic. well. insisted that is being practical. anyway. i think he has agreed to buy me itouch for christmas. well thats what i think. cause he didnt say no.


food for thought.
heres what happens to you when you receive bad news.

1. anger
2. resentment/ denial
3. acceptance
4. hope for the better

something like that i cant remb entirely.

its frustrating to be able to realize and spot the problem and yet not be able to do something about it. its hard to just sit still and accept the fact that there is no solution.

i love my daddy!

from my point of view, life seems to be terribly unfair towards me. well i wont deny that everyone has their fair share of problems. but mine just seem to be weighing down on me. its like a burden that i am lugging around. and now its so heavy that i even find it difficult to take another step further. maybe its due to the fact that i keeping running away from problems. so they are all accumulating up, suffocating me. every thing is just so unfair. everything.

why do i have to face obstacles that no one else have to? why must i take a bumpy path instead of a smooth one. why. its really taking a toll on me. i rather just have a normal life. i rather be poor and happy. i would give up everything just to be happy. i would.

June, i miss you. i have so much to tell you!

sometimes i will ask myself. why does God put me, anyone through all these torments and sufferings. when i know the answer myself. cause God is preparing us for something bigger. he wants to test if we are up for it. yadayadayada. i know its kinda rude. but have he ever wondered that. i dont want to be put through all these. i want my peaceful life. i rather it be smooth sailing and plain. i rather not be able to experience joy because i dont experience pain.

because life is never fair. because you wont be able to taste joy without pain. really. tell that to the people that are suffering. they wont find it that amusing.

because life and relationships are so fragile and unpredictable. we should all stop whining and start showing appreciation for all we have. cause maybe then, we will not have regrets.

i have never liked living.